Charlyn’s Web

Patience is a virtue, so I am told. Motherhood will expand that virtue farther than you ever thought possible and in the strangest ways. One of my expanding (no puns intended) places is in public restrooms.

Public restrooms may seem an odd place to grow patience but they are a breeding ground for it. They are inherently disgusting, with the germs, lack of cleanliness and smells, to begin with; throw in my two heathens beautiful little girls and you have quite the breeding ground for the testing of Motherly Patience.

We usually use the handicapped stall because I insist that we all use the same one. Once, I let KJ go into a stall by herself and had to crawl under the door to get her out. Granted it was in an office building and fairly clean but the horror of that incident has left me with the heeby geebes. I anticipate that she will be 27 before I let her go in alone again. I herd them in and then listen to the argument about who is going first. It’s usually Miss Walnut Bladder, especially if she is doing the Pee-pee dance. She then stands in front of the toilet, waiting for me to pull her pants down. This is the child whose favorite thing to say is “Me Do It!” but for some reason when we are crammed in a stall, she can’t. Well, it is hard to get your pants down over those fast moving legs doing the complicated steps of her dance. Then it’s KJ’s turn. She always manages to drag her skirt (because she is almost always wearing a skirt) on the floor. While we wait for her, TG tries to look under the walls to see what is going on next door. By this time, my teeth are starting to grind together as she touches the floor which, according to people who study such things, is the dirtiest, most germ filled place in the restroom. If we are lucky enough to have company in the next stall, we get the loudly spoken questions about what she is doing. “Who is that? What is he doing? Oh! (giggle) Going pee!” I am loudly saying to never mind what that person is doing, it’s not polite to look under the wall and to please, get off the floor! I hope my stressed out voice is drowning out her comments. Then, lucky me, it’s my turn. By this time everyone else seems anxious to leave the confines of the stall and are actively trying to get the door open. “Don’t mess with the door….Don’t MESS with the DOOR!” I have a thing about exposing myself to the world. Then there is the trauma of flushing. It’s noisy and it’s been decided that it is unbearable. So I have to let them out before I flush so that they will be farther from the offending noise.

If, for some reason, we crowd into a “normal” sized stall it is much more thrilling. It’s almost like a clown car. Who are these “normal” sized people that can easily get into them? We crowd in and then have to orchestrate where everyone stands so we can get the door closed. Once one is done then we have to reshuffle. And getting out is an exercise in itself. They always seem to be in a hurry and not waiting to get everyone into a good position. One is getting squished behind the door while the other is getting stuck between the door and the toilet paper holder. I am pushed up against the toilet by the door, trying to help out.

Once we are free of the confines of the stall. Deep breath. We “get” to wash our hands. This is another test of patience as faucets get turned on and soap is reached for. Ever notice how high up the soap dispensers are? Of course not because you are an adult. They are always too high for kids but kids are the independent ones who insist on “doing it myself!” The things to push to get the soap out are also pretty stiff and hard for a kid to do one handed. I once had wet hands when I lifted TG up to get her soap and her shirt got wet. Now, I get to listen to her remind me EVERY TIME to not get her wet. She is such a nag. As I am telling KJ to not touch the faucet and leave the water running her little hand shoots out and pushes down the handle. I hand them towels- the hand blower is too noisy and we don’t like it- and say “don’t touch anything!” as I wash my hands. I look around to see TG playing with a stall door handle and KG touching the walls. We go to leave and before I can get there with a paper towel to open the door, their hands are all over the handle and the door itself. Why did I bother to wash their hands?

By this time, any patience I had in reserves is gone. I am stressed out. The only thing I have left to look forward to is getting to do it all over again in about an hour.

What 4 year old goes to McDonalds and wants a salad?

And what 3 year old gets chicken nuggets and then eats most of her Mother’s salad?

I don’t think it has to do with marketing or wrappers– they like salad. I’m surprised they like it over the other things they could get there though.

But I’m not complaining!

TG came upstairs at my parents’ with her socks and shoes for me to put on so she could go into the woods. Being the wise and insightful parent (don’t laugh) I asked:

“Who are you going with into the woods ?”

“The woods!” She answers.

O.K. Try this again-

“Yes, the woods. WHO is going with you?”

“THE WOODS!” She forcefully says.

One more time.

“I understand you want to go into the woods- who all is going?”

“THE WOODS!!!” she yells.

She is thinking: My mother doesn’t listen! I have told her THREE times what I’m doing!

I’m thinking: Pronoun trouble.

We took our little Sunshine in for her 3 year checkup last week. She wowed the Doctor with her smiles and laughs. She was cooperative through the whole thing- even when the Doctor pulled some built up ear wax out. Our Doctor is moving out of the area and she will be sorely missed. We’ve been with her through all those infant check-ups, three times over. She sat through my list of questions with number one- once she was so anxious to see my list she grabbed it from my hand. (Tip for all Doctor appointments- make a list! I get amnesia when I enter that small room.) Some how the list kept getting shorter with each kid. She is verbal and we shared the same type of humor. Now, with fewer and fewer appointments ahead of us (Lord willing), we will not get to know the next one as well.

Anyway, how the children grow! For those of you who don’t have kids or for those that it’s a foggy memory- to monitor the growth of children they are put on a chart that determines what “percentile” they are in. If a child is in the 50th percentile then they are average- 50% of kids are shorter and 50% are taller.

Here’s the stats-

TG- 36 pounds (close to the 90th percentile) 40 inches (90th percentile)

KJ- 37 1/2 pounds (just under the 50th percentile) 43 3/4 inches (75th percentile)

HP- 62 1/4 pounds (just under the 90th) 53″ (4′ 5″- Over the 97th percentile)

KJ looks like she is still the “Pixie” of the family. As a perspective at three she was 30 pounds and 38 1/4 inches.

Caw! Caw! Caw!

The sounds drifted in through the open window at Grandma and Grandpa’s.

TG looked up and said:

“I hear the ducks!”

Caw! Caw! Caw!

Grampa said to TG “You are a happy little person!”

She replied: “I’m not person, I’m Tia!”

My Little Sunshine turns three today.

She’s not so little but she is a smiler.

It’s hard to believe that it’s been three years already.

It’s been fun to watch her grow; to watch her personality bloom. She’s a great hugger! But watch out! She’ll run up, grab your legs in a killer squeeze when you least expect it. She has been known to about knock me over- 35 plus pounds flinging themselves at your legs when you’re not looking can definitely cause someone to lose their balance. She’ll grit her teeth, say “squeeze” and run off.

She has become better at verbalizing what she wants without screeching. From telling me she’s sick -“I don’t feel” as she lays her head on my lap, to the spontaneous “I wuv you!” to letting you know how things are -“I’m Tia, not honey!” and “Me do it!”. She has the funniest and most annoying little voice. It can be rough, shrill and grating to hear but still it can be the sweetest sound to a Mama’s ears. She used to screech and scream a lot but has quieted down quite a bit.

She likes music and can pick up the beat right away. She likes to sing, I’ve heard her sing “Happy (Birth)Day You” and “Jesus Loves me” and I could tell what they were by the tune!

She likes animals. She will often check on and greet the dog. She’ll check on him through the day and let him in if she feels he is cold (even if it’s 70 degress + out).

She loves to “read”. She will sit and look at books for the longest time. There doesn’t even have to be pictures in the book! She has a book she calls her “bible” which is actually a devotional that Gambler’s Anonymous gave away at a Family Conference. She likes to go to bed with it, checks her crib to see if it’s in there and will look through it. She’s about wore it out! She does like her books, but for the longest time it was hard to get her to sit to listen to a book being read. She is doing better now.

She’s a labeler. She likes to know names of things and whose they are. Of course, because she has been two, most things are “mine!” or “Tia’s!” Once she has a label on it, she’ll check once in awhile to make sure it still fits. “Mama’s?” Yes. “Oh, Mama’s.” I found with the first born, HP, that he didn’t use the term “Mine!” very much. I don’t know why, it’s not really his personality. The second born did use it, partly because there was a big brother to take things away. But she out grew it. Not my TG. It’s not that she will grab every toy in sight and scream “mine!” as I have seen some kids do. She doesn’t automatically yell it when another kid picks up a toy. But somehow it is important to her to attach a label to things. Whether it’s “mine” or “Tia’s” or “Mama’s”, it needs a name and a place.

She’s independant. “Me do it!” is often heard around here. So with patience waning, I’ll let her do it until she realizes she can’t or I’ll be a overbearing parent and tell her that she can’t do it and I must and then I listen to the shrieks.

She’s growing up, soon these days shall pass. But she will always be my Sunshine and my baby.

At almost three (in two weeks!) my baby, Talia, is speaking very well. She has expanded her vocabulary and is speaking whole thoughts and sentences although sometimes haltingly as if she is having to keep her mouth up with her mind. It’s fun to hear. Especially when that little mouth gets large words out- like cucumber and actually.

Ever notice how little kids will mimic what they hear the most? Hans said “probably” quite a bit and Kirsten says “well” frequently. I wonder where they hear those words?

Last night there was a thunder and lightning storm. Not the kind one would see in the central part of the United States but a mild Oregon one. There was flashes of light and the low rumble of thunder off in the distance. The kids were running around the house looking out different windows when I realized that Talia probably had not seen a storm before. I watched her as she wandered into the kitchen and asked if she was ok. Her answer was priceless.

“Perhaps I’m scared.”

Talia comments: “My cute little foot hurts!”

Kirsten: “My little foot didn’t touch your computer!”

That last one leaves one wondering about it’s sincerity.

Talia is a little singer.

On our walk the other day she was strutting along singing: “Only boy, David!” over and over again.

If you remember any children’s Bible songs that one is “Only a Boy Named David”. She had the tune kind of right but was dropping a few of the words. And lines, and verses. Who needs all that stuff anyway?

Another one she was singing was – “Happy, happy, happy!” I wondered what she was trying to sing and then I caught “Happy New Year!” and I realised she was singing “Wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!” We were blessed (and I use that word loosely) with a singing Snowman at our last Harvest Festival and it has turned into a favorite of hers. Yeah. I am thrilled. Can’t you tell? But I DO love to hear Talia singing it. I like her version because it is “Happy” and makes me smile.

Another favorite that doesn’t come out quite right is the Happy Birthday song. But I like it, it says it all.

“Happy Day You! Happy Day You!”

And today is a Happy Day since it is dear friend Boo Boo’s birthday. Happy Day You!