Charlyn’s Web

Stuff you drink in the autumn.

A conversation I actually overheard last night.

“Actually, it’s mine T!”

“Actually, it’s mine K!”

I actually don’t know where they learn these words.

It’s hard to believe that our sweet, cheery little baby is capable of brutally pummeling her older siblings!

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HP reading to his sisters. What precious gifts from God they all are!

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I decided it was high time to clean the shower in the Master Bath. I know it’s autumn but I don’t think the tub should be decorated in orange and brown even at this time of the year.

I bought a new shower liner, took the old one down, washed the pretty outer part and sprayed down the tub.

As I started to work TG decided to join me.

“Are you cleaning Papa’s shower?”

Yep.

She kneels down next to me.

“This is Papa’s shower but he lets you use it.”

Yep, Papa is nice that way. He also “lets” me clean it.

“There’s your stinky butt.”

It’s just my back and butts aren’t stinky.

“Are you cleaning the tub?”

Yep.

“There’s your stinky butt, again.”

Honey, we don’t say butts are stinky and in this house we use the term “bum.”

She breathes the fumes in deeply and I cringe thinking that when she gets lung cancer, I will remember this moment with horror.

Why don’t you go outside?

“No!”

Why don’t you get dressed?

After much fussing about she takes off her nighty and gets her pants on.

“Will you snap my pants?”

My head is stuck in the tub still and my gloved hands are all wet and dirty.

Ah, no.

“Snap my pants!”

You’ll have to wait until my hands aren’t dirty and wet.

“Look at me!”

She’s standing with her head on the floor and her bum up in the air.

I have to look to get her to stop saying it over and over.

Why don’t you put your shirt on?

“No, my pants aren’t snapped.”

Yes, why don’t you get your shirt on and brush your teeth while you wait for me?

“But my pants aren’t snapped.”

Sigh.

Finally, the job is done, I get her pants snapped and her shirt on. After her version of “looking” for her shoes is over (playing with other stuff while saying she can’t find her shoes) she finally goes outside leaving me to wonder how I ever got stuff done without all this help.

We had a nice breakfast this morning. On Saturday I usually make a big hot breakfast. This morning we had Sausage, Mushroom and Cheese Omelet, hash browns and whole wheat toast.

I asked TG if she wanted ketchup on her potatoes.

“Uh-uhh” was the reply.

Now, the TV (or TB depending on who you ask) was on and there was other talk going on at the table so I missed what exactly it was she mumbled.

So I asked again.

“Uh-uhh!” was the reply again.

Now, I am starting to feel frustrated because I can’t make out what she is saying, partly because she is not looking at me and I know if I get it wrong it would be catastrophic, for heavens sake. So being a deaf, dense Mother, I ask again.

Do you want ketchup on your potatoes?!?

“I said No! I said no two times!!!”

Oooo-kay.

A bit later, Little Miss I Said No Two Times said “I need (a favorite term of hers) that (as she points to the ketchup) on this! (as she points to her hash browns)”

Not in your lifetime.

I made some very yummy Peaches and Cream muffins the other day. I made them with the sour cream option instead of milk. We had them for dessert.

I was gathering up the paper cup liners when I noticed there was none around TG. I started looking around for it and asked her where it was.

“I do’know.”

What do you mean you don’t know? Did it fall off the table?

I pull her out and look on her lap and on the floor. By this time everyone was looking around. Where could it be?

Then I asked- “you didn’t eat it, did you?”

By this time she was getting a little perturbed with all the questions and forceably informed me-

“Yes, it’s in my tummy! And it’s NOT fat!”

More than one. Could be two, three, ten, twenty-five.

“Look! Horses! Two horses!” Says TG as she points to a group of four horses.

I think it’s pretty typical for a child her age but it’s cute anyway.

Bonzo was a dog of Col. Panic’s who would excuse himself after a burp with a low, small “woof”. This became an inside joke between us. I guess we “woof” fairly often because I was in the bathroom with KJ the other day when she burped.

“Woof.” She said.

Now, why doesn’t she pick up real manners like that?

**********

We bought KJ a new bike not too long ago. It has training wheels on it but they are raised up pretty high so she can get over the rocky areas. When she is on the pavement her training wheels are quite loud so it can be heard whether or not she is balancing. We were down on the pavement the other day- KJ and HP on their bikes and TG on her “Dirt King” Trike. KJ was yelling excitedly “I’m balancing! I’m balancing!”

TG came peddling along behind yelling “I’m balancing! I’m balancing!”

That’s a good thing.

***********

I pulled into the Library parking lot yesterday as TG excitedly said “Can we go see the mountain?!?!”

Mountain? I looked around the flat parking lot. Mountain?!? At the Library? What mountain? Then it dawned on me.

“Yes, we can go see the Fountain.”

TG has been calling our Pastor- “Master Bill”. I think she must have confused “Mister” and Pastor- blending the two to create “Master”. This has tickled us and provided some teasing fodder. But in this little exchange she got it all right.

I was saying night time prayers with the girls and said something along the lines of “Bless Pastor Bill and Ms. Bea. Amen.”

TG looked up at me with a tender look on her face and said “I love Pastor Bill!”

KJ, not to be out done, chirped “I love Pastor Bill too… and his husband!”

That will be news to him in more ways than one!